Mexican dating rituals
Then you can say actually means ‘to please,’ so what you’re saying when you say, ‘I like these tacos’ is actually ‘these tacos please me,’ and when used with people it has overt sexual connotations.So no good for the opening stages of a relationship, depending on how your opening stages go.From there, there’s just it doubles as ‘I love you’, so they’re no good either. No easy way either to say ‘I’m going out with’ someone, which is how we handle things in the US until time served has made it obvious that we can start adding the –friend suffix to our boy or girl.In Mexico, the leap to is almost immediate, which makes it hard to engage in the allergy to quick commitment that is the hallmark of US dating.Which is crippling here—I have to force myself to participate because that’s how it’s done, and with every new message I send, the risk of a snowballing torrent from the other side mounts.I asked some of my lady coworkers about all this at the fair and they laid a few things out.Instead of making them more reserved, as it has, eventually, us, technology has served to make Mexican dating even more publicizable. Because we have a different way of going about it, American men have the reputation here of being , very cold, and I always mention it at the outset.A kind of disclaimer to signal early on what will be my total failure to live up to expectations.
So when my host family pesters me about why I’m not dating a nice girl from Jalpan, it’s difficult to explain the breadth of the baggage that lies between me and that.She seemed like a nice girl, probably would have been a nice girl in person, but waking up to that cascade created an almost physical sense of revulsion in me, brought me back to those freshman nights playing the antagonist in Gaga’s “Telephone,” and I knew I’d never send her another message.After dating that first girl for so long at long distance, there was a point at which I found everything easier over text or chat. Not so anymore, and I only have so much patience for trying to get to know somebody, trying to hold an extended dialogue over my no-keyboard little Mexican burner phone.By and large, the more traditional the girl, the more this applies.They say they want to be doggedly pursued in a way that’s fallen entirely out of fashion in the US.